Closure for 2012
2012 was an incredibly exciting year for me, tinted with colour but also with stains, and still I would not change a single thing about it.
As I sit on a plane to my homeland trying to write a meaningful post, I find myself feeling pretty empty and meaningless and at loss for words... Wow I have actually sat here for 10 minutes now marveling at my own emptiness and my inability to continue to write something.
I think I should feel upset, or maybe a little confused over the idea that I could have lost my writing magic. Strangely, I am feeling relieved and surprised. I am remembering just now that one of my wishes for 2013 is for my life to be simpler.
Right now I can't help but be present to how simple and light I feel. Therefore, in this moment I will not proceed to account all my adventures of 2012, I have no need and no use for that, as it is in the past. As for my goals, dreams, schedules and expectations for 2013, those are stories that will be narrated and they come to exist.
I remember the day I started writing this blog as I prepared for my first show. I was at a peak moment in my life and nothing could stop me. I had enough energy for the whole world and I wanted to help others, make a difference, share all of my discoveries and opinions. I was fresh, naive, and looking back at some moments I also think I was too much sometimes. I was on a high of discovery and positivity, and my ignorance and innocence in the process saved me from negativity. I gathered a lot of positive supporters and fans, and a few haters.
All of this changed as I prepared for my second show, life got a little tougher and my outlook darkened. I became a little more sarcastic and cynic in my writing, but my goal was still to empower others in their goals by showing them what I was going through and that I am not superhuman. I toned down a little bit in my exuberant energy as I became humbled by some personal loses. The process itself, lacking the rush of discovery, became a little tougher. Many more haters showed their true colours, some of which truly surprised me as they were people I considered close (this really hurt and was a huge wake up call for me).
I have started my preparation to compete on my 3rd show at national level (first time I am publicly acknowledging this and it is scary). I feel that the tone on my blog will change yet again. I do not know what it will look like, but I bet you are in for a treat.
I want it to be honest, I want it to be simple and I want it to inspire more people to jump on big scary challenges of their own. Also hopefully it will spring more networking and online interaction, because as much as I write for myself, I also write to be acknowledged in some way or another, otherwise I might as well write a personal diary and keep it tucked in under my pillow.
Happy 2013 to all, live powerfully, there is only one life and one moment.
As I sit on a plane to my homeland trying to write a meaningful post, I find myself feeling pretty empty and meaningless and at loss for words... Wow I have actually sat here for 10 minutes now marveling at my own emptiness and my inability to continue to write something.
I think I should feel upset, or maybe a little confused over the idea that I could have lost my writing magic. Strangely, I am feeling relieved and surprised. I am remembering just now that one of my wishes for 2013 is for my life to be simpler.
Right now I can't help but be present to how simple and light I feel. Therefore, in this moment I will not proceed to account all my adventures of 2012, I have no need and no use for that, as it is in the past. As for my goals, dreams, schedules and expectations for 2013, those are stories that will be narrated and they come to exist.
I remember the day I started writing this blog as I prepared for my first show. I was at a peak moment in my life and nothing could stop me. I had enough energy for the whole world and I wanted to help others, make a difference, share all of my discoveries and opinions. I was fresh, naive, and looking back at some moments I also think I was too much sometimes. I was on a high of discovery and positivity, and my ignorance and innocence in the process saved me from negativity. I gathered a lot of positive supporters and fans, and a few haters.
All of this changed as I prepared for my second show, life got a little tougher and my outlook darkened. I became a little more sarcastic and cynic in my writing, but my goal was still to empower others in their goals by showing them what I was going through and that I am not superhuman. I toned down a little bit in my exuberant energy as I became humbled by some personal loses. The process itself, lacking the rush of discovery, became a little tougher. Many more haters showed their true colours, some of which truly surprised me as they were people I considered close (this really hurt and was a huge wake up call for me).
I have started my preparation to compete on my 3rd show at national level (first time I am publicly acknowledging this and it is scary). I feel that the tone on my blog will change yet again. I do not know what it will look like, but I bet you are in for a treat.
I want it to be honest, I want it to be simple and I want it to inspire more people to jump on big scary challenges of their own. Also hopefully it will spring more networking and online interaction, because as much as I write for myself, I also write to be acknowledged in some way or another, otherwise I might as well write a personal diary and keep it tucked in under my pillow.
Happy 2013 to all, live powerfully, there is only one life and one moment.
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